I often hear this when working with couples. The truth is when they look for help their relationship has already deteriorated and the only light they see it "out".
Love is a decision and not a feeling. Love is working, changing, making it better and eventually more passionate.
Here are some tips on how to get your passion wheels turning again:
❣️ Turn yourself into a passionate being in everything you do!
❣️ Go on weekly date nights minus the kiddos
❣️ Try new things together: a new hobby, restaurant or town
❣️ Be adventurous in the bedroom - try new things often
❣️ Flirt, send sexy messages, get those sparks going again
❣️ Kiss passionately - pretend you are a movie star
❣️ Dress up for each other
❣️ Also dress down, Pijamas days are the best days!
❣️ Eliminate the stressors in your routine
❣️ Start each day with gratitude for that other person
If you would like more help please reach out. I have helped many couples in similar situations ❣️
Self Love and Money
Yesterday while at the dentist office (I love my dentist and his staff - I actually look forward to going to the dentist now so if you are in the Aurora/Centennial area check out Lotus Family Dental) okay back to the point - so while there we started talking about confidence and how being confident is so important not only in the workforce but just in daily life.
Confident people tend to earn more and be happier.
They are NOT confident because they are happier and earn more.
They ARE happier and earn more because they are confident!
Confidence comes from self-steam and in my opinion, self-steam comes from self-love. When you love yourself enough to give yourself grace when you fail you will be more likely to step out of your comfort zone and also most likely to fail more often which will lead you to stumble upon the greatest people and amazing opportunities.
Have you ever seen a success story begin with I was born wealthy and became wealthier - or I was born in a loving home and had an even more lovingly home.... boring, to say the least! Don't get me wrong those stories of stability are amazing and much needed but the stories that normally get on the best seller's list or the big screen are the ones about overcoming!
Lack of self -steam can impact your marriage (it is impossible to have a great marriage if you don't feel as an equal - without self-stem will always feel less than your significant other), your friendships (how can you have amazing friends if you are always doing what they want to do unable to speak your mind?), your role as a parent (society changes its perspective on parenting hour by hour so confidence in your parenting style is key here) and even in the workforce (How will you ask for that promotion or apply for that amazing job if you are not ok with stepping out of your comfort zone?).
How to gain confidence?
Remember that the creator chose you out of 100 million (according to a little google search of how many sperms is produced per ejaculation to generate a life) so if you know that someone loved you so much to pick you out of 100 million then you realize that everything happens for you and not against you! Realizing this will make you stand up taller, and own your own beautiful self.
Practice self-care daily. Do things that make you happy just because. It can be a bath, a book or a movie. Doesn't matter how big or small as long as it does your soul good.
Don't settle. Speak up for the things that you believe in. You will be judged and that is ok. This does not mean that the world has to agree with you but just stand in your own truth in a way that is true to you. Speak up your needs in your relationships, for that promotion, for that business idea, for your friends and especially for yourself.
After all, the sky is not the limit, your mind is!
Click on the link comments to schedule a discovery call with me. Together we will trailblaze your journey to self-love.
Photo by DESIGNECOLOGIST on Unsplash
Rebeca Storck Lima
If you have read any self-help book or seen any motivational videos recently you have probably seen or heard about the power of visualization.
Recently, in my facebook group (btw if you are not yet part of the Life & Money Coaching group come join us - we have weekly discussions from everything from life to money) I posted a question - What would you do if you had 1 million dollars today? Some of the members gave me very detailed answers which I loved. I could tell instantly that this wasn't the first time they thought of the details of being a millionaire; others said that they haven't even dared to dream. Having such a high amount on their bank accounts is crazy and will never happen so what is the point?
It's heartbreaking to know that sometimes in life we go through such hardships that it not only takes away everything and every feeling we have but it also takes our power to dream. Without dreams, we are hopeless just going through the motions of our existence. We lose our sense of purpose and meaningfulness.
Jim Carrey wrote himself a check in 1985 for 10 million dollars for acting services rendered. There in the hollywood hills sleeping in his car amid desperation, he dreamed of making it big and 10 years later he was paid that exact amount for his acting in Dumb and Dumber!
Will Smith also swears by the law of attraction stating that “In my mind, I've always been an A-list Hollywood superstar. Y'all just didn't know yet,” Smith has said of the visualizing techniques that helped him along the way.
Oprah promised herself after seeing her family struggle that her life would be different. She is one of the richest women in the world and inspires fans to “Create the highest, grandest vision possible for your life because you become what you believe. ”
I want to inspire you today to dream and visualize your highest purpose here on earth - either because of desperation of where you are or inspiration that the best is yet to come!
Inspiration or desperation - You decide!
And if you are lost in a sea of desperation, don't hesitate to reach out. I would love to map a destination plan with you!
Rebeca Storck Lima
I often hear clients say how mad they are over a situation - their financial life, their relationships or their job. Getting mad is a very raw emotion and emotions are what drives us.
The problem is many of us let is stop there.
Get mad to get ahead!
Get so mad that you are laser-focused on changing whatever it is that you are mad about! Be so mad that you can no longer stand debt and you will take any side hustle to pay everything you owe. Be so mad that you will no longer stand that relationship that is completely unfulfilling or that friendship that keeps taking advantage of you.
Be mad enough to sharpen your skills to make yourself more marketable in the workplace so you don't have to retire in that place you hate.
Get real mad, mad enough to get ahead!
And in case you are mad enough that you would like to be coached through this let me know =)
Photo by Gage Walker on Unsplash
Keep the fights clean and ... you know the rest. Truth is our significant other always gets the blunt of it - or we do! We are taught many things but fighting right isn’t one of them. Some of us have bad or even explosive tempers - but if you wouldn’t talk to your boss that way you shouldn’t talk to your spouse that way!
What happens is that some believe that their temper is out of their control - but if we can control it outside the home we can train ourselves to control it with the people we love.
Most marriages don’t fail because of the big things even though lots do - they fail because of the little things happening over and over again.
My professional advice is the same for your marriage or with your money: be proactive instead of reactive.
Deal with the little issues and deal with it once and for all - don’t just put it under the rug and wait for a bad day to bring it out in the open.
Now the inside scoop is that these tips only work when we work it.
But when you do fight - do it right - and here are 7 tips to help you:
-💡Keep your voice and your emotions in check - fight rationally not emotionally
- 💡Have a key word such as “time out” so you either one of you is stepping into ugly territory you can remind each other and take a breather
- 💡Do the mirror trick: imagine a big mirror in front of you while fighting - this little trick tends to keep things clean
- 💡Always argue as your children are there and even if they are show them that people don’t always agree and how to disagree
- 💡Do the pick 3 exercise with the common issues you argue about - pick 3 things in that subject that you will agree on - if it’s money fights you will 1)agree to check with each other above a dollar amount 2) agree that everyone will try to save 3)agree on 1 short term goal if its children agree on 1) bedtime 2) punishments 3) chores and let everything else go
- 💡Try to fight out of the house and specifically out of the bedroom (we tend to keep it civil in public places)
- 💡Allow each other space to be mad and teach each other what to do when those days happen. When we are having bad days take out for dinner and Netflix might just be the recipe for those days not to turn into weeks.
This isn’t easy - let’s not pretend it is - you will forget things and fall off the wagon - just jump back on and try to do better than last time -your relationship is worthy!
If I can help you better your relationships don’t hesitate to reach out 😉
I love sharing many of my beliefs, thoughts and at times unpopular opinions.